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The Celebrity Orphans: Sexual Toothpaste

Posted by May 13th, 2008 No Comments »

The Celebrity Orphans – The Celebrity Orphans
Self-Released (2008)

If sex came in tubes of toothpaste, The Celebrity Orphans squeeze out 39 minutes worth on their new self-titled album. Up-tempo rocksters like “Hello,” “You Got Nothin,” and “Let Me Tell You” are ferociously danceable with BC Campbell and company telling the entire world just who’s doing the messin’ around now.

Take a listen to slinky “Hello” and you can imagine mister broken-heart deciding he was done being the victim: “notify my next of kin…cause you and me are gonna sin.” Or take the delta-bluesy “Let Me Tell You” where BC announces, “Listen my pretty to my little ditty cuz what do you got to lose?” Slow burners like “Broken Night” and “I Need You” (with beautiful, haunting back-up vocals from bassist Angelina Baldoz) draw comparison to Chris Isaac while the terra firma terror on “Rollercoaster” and the bouncy 70’s “Car Crash” compare favorably to the Talking Heads.

The Orphans do a curious thing with this album tracking the song list top heavy with slower material. For some musicians this would end up a regular snooze-fest, but in The Orphans’ case the material effectively leaves the listener dredging up memories of the break-up phone call, the drunken mistake, the terrifying realization that you’re single. Loneliness, tragedy, and false perception make for great songs. The Celebrity Orphans successfully build their foundation on this premise and then shellac it to the nines with sex appeal.

This freshman release is fiercely well-written and produced, with KEXP live engineer Julian Martlew at the knobs and whistles. The album showcases The Orphans at the top of their craft and announces that they are here to stay. I highly recommend you buy this album… and a toothbrush. – (8/10)

The Celebrity Orphans play the Mars Bar / Café Venus on May 15.

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